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| Kooler Design Studio |
I had to make this for my daughter.
Trying to convince my mother, the one who was going to fork out the $40 for me to have this, was a challenge. "You're 15, you don't even know if you're going to have a daughter." This was one of those moments where I needed to revert to childlike behaviour. I was ready and willing to throw a toddler like tantrum until my mother caved.
Amazingly, my mom gave in, and I won. I walked out of that store eager and excited to make this doll house, knowing in my heart, my baby girl was would enjoy it... sooner or later.
If we FWD ten years later (sooner than I would have guessed) to February 28th 2004, at the foothills hospital and just after 30 hours of labour, there she was... my Mini Starlite, the love of my life. Of course, in my minds eye, I had pictured finishing the doll house first, getting married, decorating the nursery to match the doll house, and presenting it when I arrived home with her bundled in my arms.
I don't think there is enough online blog space to write what actually happened. So let's just say this... life happened. The doll house didn't.
My first real attempt at making this blasted thing, I mean... family heirloom... was just after getting home from the hospital. Excited to get out of the house and introduce the best baby ever to the world, I took my Mini Starlite to the craft store. Overweight, sweaty, lactating and pushing around a stroller the size of King Kong in a craft store... was not my one of my best ideas. I did not have enough life experience to understand what I was getting into, namely, the needs of a new born. Needless to say, that doll house was going to have to wait another day.
FWD another five years and I find myself back in Ottawa. Not happy. I still had a few months left before having to go back to work. Very happy. I unpacked for like the 7th time in 3 years. Not happy. I find the FDH craft book. Very happy. Back to the craft store I go, only to find out they no longer carry plastic canvas. Not happy. A quick search on the internet and $300 later, I have a box FULL of plastic canvas. Me happy. The Man Star, not happy.
Around the same time, I decided I was going to commit to finishing all projects that I started including, obviously, the doll house. I started this whole "clickity clack" business, as mi familia likes to call it, in September of 2009. And the lessons I've learned about life, my life... has been detoxifying, motivating and self inspiring.
2009'ish:
The foundation - This is going to be big. Much bigger than I thought. I wonder if I chewed off more than I can handle. Whatever, I just want to get started. The foundation is actually quite boring. I want to get to the good stuff, I'll come back to it.
The living room - Now this is cool. I love the colours and the way every is coming together. Might not be my best work, but I'm figuring it out, getting better at it every stitch of the way.
A Lesson from Tarot ~ The Fool in Rev: You cannot win the race with a false start.
2010'ish:
The Kitchen - Dang. This is much harder than I thought it was going to be. Why does a doll house need so much detail? Can't wait till this is done. Okay, a million pieces stitched... and I still have to put this thing together. Boy, my daughter better love playing with this thing.
A Lesson from Tarot ~ Ten of Wands: I have three choices, carry on, delegate, or walk away.
2011'ish:
The Hallway - I should have followed the instructions. There is strategy in instructions. I can only blame myself for making this so hard.
The Bedroom - "You want it purple? But the instructions say pink. It is a Barbie house." "But I have to play with it and I hate pink." "Purple it is."
A Lesson from Tarot ~ The Emperor & The Empress: While there is stability in structure, there is Spirit in creation.
2012'ish:
The Other Hallway - Whatever, lets just get this thing done and forget about it. This isn't fun anymore. I give myself the weekend to focus and finish.
The Bathroom - Okay, good. Temper tantrum over. I've stepped away. Inhale/exhale. I can see the finish line. I can see a house. I'm am learning some new techniques.
A Lesson from Tarot ~ Five of Wands in Rev: Face your challenges. The reward is in the resolution.
2013'ish:
The Attic - Well, I've pissed around long enough now to realize... my baby is no longer plays with Barbie. Oh well. I've come to far to give up.
The foundation (again) - Who would have thought. Four years later, and I'm re-stiching the foundation of the house, because I didn't do it the first time. However, this time it looks fresh. Complete. And it's some of the best stitching I've done to date.
But wait...does this mean... I finished what I started? Why am I not over joyed? Why am I not crying? Where is that sense of... Yes! I am a superstar!!
A Lesson from Tarot ~ Eight of Pentacles in Rev: Do what you love, and avoid the search for self worth.
Of all the things I coulda, shoulda and woulda... this is my #magicmoment: I will finish what I start, but only if it has value and because I really want to.
Goodbye books that that I've held on to for years, but have no desire to read. I hope someone else enjoys you. See you later material bought in the '90s, may your retro'ness be repurposed. Crafts, clothes and other crap... you'll be great $5 fillers at the garage sale.
My heart races and my hands itch... I am so excited to have finally learned to let go. In the process of letting go, I am opening the door to new adventures. Adventures that will forever be #indigospirit inspired.
1000's of stitches... 100's of hours... and even more curse words later...
I've built the house. It is a home. And you are Welcome...
just don't forget to BYOBarbie
)o(
In love and light,
Amanda
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